Zee English Language

Yesterday I interviewed for a job at Health Science Nutrition to be one of their writer/bloggers. It made me start to think about the English language and how ridiculous it is. I love to write, read and I'm learning to love crossword puzzles even though they make me feel dumb. It is fun though to realize how many weird and funny things there are about our language.  My dad sent me an email a while ago about some of the amusing things that we never think about until we are teaching our language to someone else.


From my Daddy:
Hello, out there, or their? and they're

My grandmother sent my grandfather a letter when they were courting and she asked him some questions and entitled it "Harvey please answer!"

Why do you park in the drive way and drive on the parkway?
Did you ever see a stepping stone?
Did you ever see a toilet bowl?
Did you ever see a horse fly?
Did you ever see a peanut stand?
Did you ever see a board walk?
Did you ever see a garden hoe or a garden hose?
Did you ever see a sheet for a river bed?
Where can you get a cap for your knee?
Did you ever see a sock hop? A bed tick? A neck tie? A night fall?
A clock run? A bag pipe? A nose run?
Have you seen a turkey dressing? A day pass by? A bed spring? A light switch? A flower pedal? A ranch dressing? A belly button?

Do ships have eyes when they go out to sea?
Are there springs in the river bed?

From Roger Ray:

1) The bandage was wound around the wound.

2) The farm was used to produce produce .

3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.

4) We must polish the Polish furniture.

5) He could lead if he would get the lead out.

6) The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.

7) Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present .

8) A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.

9) When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.

10) I did not object to the object.

11) The insurance was invalid for the invalid.

12) There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row .

13) They were too close to the door to close it.

14) The buck does funny things when the does are present.

15) A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line...

16) To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.

17) The wind was too strong to wind the sail.

18) Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.

19) I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.


This doesn't even begin to touch the parts of English that people pronounce completely differently, usually depending on your region. 

PEE-Can vs. Pe-CON, (Pecan)
Milk vs. MELK
Wash vs. Warsh (Washington vs. Warshington)


Just a few of the words right off the top of my head and a subject I have been thinking about a lot lately. Hope you enjoyed.